21.01.2012

tried on red lip stain for the first time. omg scared myself LOL. looked kinda funny :( but baby said it was quite hot so left it on ^^. he kissed it all away later anyways lololol ^_^. was going to wear my cardi but then he said he was wearing a blazer so i decided to match him ^^" and untucked my top cos it looked better as it was long at the back (: went to baby's house,met his dad as his "girlfriend" for the first time lol i was so scared XD. anyways, spent some time there, messed around and watched a film ^__^" spent some quality time together, then said bye to his parents and his mum as his girlfriend.. i was just like >__<  LOL <3. hehe. went to stratford, i returned some stuff and that took ages. just grabbed something to eat ^^". went to west ham but there was no c2c trains :( grrrr. went to barking and NONE went to home *sigh. so i decided to get on the train that went to grays~ said byebye to baby :(. thought he was taking me to the station cos he loved me and i felt so special but realised he was going out clubbing anyway thats why he took me -__- LOL grr. anyways, i was so scared when i got on the train, everyone seemed drunk or foreign or both and just dodgey in general. and i was wearing like, knee highs with sheer tights. i felt unsafe so i moved backwards along the carriage and it wasnt much better tbh ><". i was so scared. everytime i looked up like someone was looking at me T_T. so i just avoided all eye contact and kept texting to keep me busy. lucky mum got to grays to pick me up before i got there so i didnt have to wait around like last time. phewwwwwwwwww. those moments when you curse yourself for wearing that particular outfit lol. got home, and had a depression mode. couldnt sleep at all and kept crying :( felt so lonely too and baby was clubbing so had no one to turn to *sigh. had about 5 hours sleep and went to work the next day feeling like X______X and period PAINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN.

what i actually ended up wearing ^^

i love you ^________^

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥